Genie In A Bottle
by ijnfleetadmiral
Summary: A Marine brings an old lamp home from his tour in Afghanistan, along with a genie whose intentions are good, but her wish-granting skills leave something to be desired... Maria / Cena
1. Chapter 1: A Lamp From A Cave

**Genie in a Bottle**

**Disclaimer:** Don't own WWE or any of the wrestlers. If I did own the franchise, my life would be a helluva lot better than it currently is.

**Pairings:** Maria / Cena

**Summary:** A Marine brings an old lamp home from his tour in Afghanistan, along with a genie whose intentions are good, but her wish-granting skills leave something to be desired...

**Chapter One: A Lamp From A Cave...**

Major John Cena, U. S. M. C., walked through the Kabul marketplace with a squad from his battalion. Cena was congratulating himself, for he'd just completed his last patrol with the unit before he was scheduled to be rotated out. It would mark the end of his third overseas tour since 2001, and he couldn't be happier to see it end.

As he walked through the busy marketplace, his senses on high alert, he half-listened to the merchants selling their trade, and did a little window-shopping himself. This tour had marked his first time in Afghanistan, and he wanted to take something home to commemorate it, as he'd done with every other place he'd ever been stationed.

One merchant stand in particular caught his eye, and he slowly led his squad through the marketplace in that direction. When they reached the stand, he glanced at the nicely-painted pottery the merchant had for sale.

"Looking for anything in particular?" the merchant asked in Afghani.

John struggled to remember his basic Afghan, and when that failed, simply smiled and shook his head. He was about to choose a vase with a lovely pattern of reds, yellows, and oranges when he saw a lamp sitting on a shelf behind the merchant. The lamp looked like an antique...something straight out of _Aladdin_.

The Marine officer indicated the lamp and the merchant smiled and eagerly brought it down for closer inspection. John knew he was no judge of an excellent antique, but he figured it would make a nice conversation piece someday. He got one of his subordinates to translate the amount the merchant wanted, paid for his purchase, and after clipping the lamp to his belt, led the squad back to their Humvee. Once back in his quarters on base, he stowed the lamp in his duffel and turned his thoughts back to his duties.

Ten Days Later

John stretched out on his sofa in the living room of his apartment that was about twenty minutes away from his new assignment at Camp Lejune. He couldn't have come back at a better time: his beloved Red Sox were in the National League Championship Series, and he of course had the game going as he slowly unpacked.

He was almost to the bottom of his duffel bag when he rediscovered the lamp he'd purchased. He looked at it after setting it on his coffee table and then shrugged.

"I'll get some Brasso tomorrow and polish it a little. It'll look better after that."

He then turned his attention back to the game for the remainder of the evening, and whooped loudly when Boston knocked off the Dodgers to face Philadelphia in the World Series.

With the game over, he shut the TV off and yawned. He glanced at the lamp once more and picked it up, taking a clean napkin from the pizza place he'd ordered from earlier in the evening and rubbing on the top of the lamp to see if he could get some of the tarnish off.

Suddenly, the lamp glowed in his hand and smoke began to pour out of the end. Cena hurriedly set it back on the coffee table and quickly backed away from it, his Parris Island-bred instincts now on full alert.

There was a loud bang like a gunshot and then a brief flash of light that made the Marine blink in surprise. When his vision finally cleared, a young woman was standing before him, looking incredibly confused.

Despite his astonishment, the Marine couldn't deny she was beautiful. Long auburn hair fell to her middle back, and confused eyes the color of Hershey's chocolate darted around the room, taking in her new surroundings. The royal purple top she wore only barely covered a well-proportioned chest and displayed a flat, lightly-tanned stomach, while her filmy, opaque lavender skirt wrapped around what was probably one of the most fantastic set of legs he'd ever seen.

The young woman turned to him and spoke nervously.

"Where is Sheik Hassan?"

"Who?" Cena asked blankly.

"Our Master," the young woman replied. "Did he finally receive confirmation that Rome has fallen?"

That made John do a double-take. "What? I don't know what you're talking about...I ain't got a master. My allegiance is to the United States of America and through them the United States Marine Corps."

She looked at him, seemingly interested in what he was saying.

"What's this 'United States' you're talking about?"

Cena looked at her skeptically. "The one founded in 1776 when the Continental Congress signed the Declaration of Independence."

"What's the Declaration of Independence?" was the next question, causing the Marine to gape at the young woman.

"You're shittin' me, right?"

"What's 'shittin'' mean?"

Cena took a deep breath in and slowly let it out. The girl either had amnesia or she'd been living on Neptune for quite some time and had just decided to drop back in.

"What's the last major piece of news you remember hearing about?"

A thoughtful expression came over the girl's face that Cena would've found incredibly cute had he not been so frustrated. Suddenly she brightened, and the smile she wore could've lit up a room. John was mesmerized by its beauty.

"I know!" She exclaimed. "I heard that Rome was surrounded and about to fall!"

"Oh, crap." John plopped down on the couch, and the girl sat down on the floor at his feet, looking up at him expectantly. John raised an eyebrow at her behavior.

"Um, you can sit on the couch...that's what it's for." he told her, and she graced him with another bright smile that turned his insides to mush.

"Thank you, Master!" she beamed as she got up from the floor and sat beside him on the plush leather.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa...what's this 'Master' stuff?" The Marine demanded. "I don't own you."

"You became my new Master when you released me from my lamp," was the response. "I'm allowed to grant you three wishes. Although," - an uncertain expression came over her face - "you may wish to make sure you're far from Sheik Hassan when you ask me to grant said wishes...his men are many and his power is great."

"That's it!" Cena stood up and headed into his bedroom, coming back with his laptop. He took it out of its carrying case, set it on his lap, opened it, and turned it on. As it booted up, the girl watched it in wonder.

"A magic folding box! Amazing!"

"It's called a 'laptop computer'," Cena replied uneasily, before realizing he'd never even introduced himself. "I'm John, by the way."

"I'm Maria, Master," was the reply.

With the laptop now fully loaded, John logged onto the internet, typed 'Sheik Hassan' into the Google search box, and hit 'Search'.

"Ok, let's see...Sheik Hassan Zakiri al-Shieb...died in 41 A.D.." He turned to Maria. "The guy's been dead nearly 2,000 years...I think we're cool."

The beautiful redhead was looking at an ad on the page. "Caesar's Palace in Las Vegas...wow, that must be some place if he moved his entire palace there."

John was about to inform her that the Vegas casino had absolutely nothing to do with the palace she was thinking of, when she pointed to another ad on the screen showing a shot of the Earth.

"What's that a picture of?"

"The Earth," Cena replied, and Maria blinked in surprised before staring off into the distance with a dumbfounded look on her face.

"The Earth is round?" she asked, surprised at what she'd just learned. Cena sighed. He was getting a major headache.

"Ok, I have to work tomorrow, and I need some sleep, so how about we continue this tomorrow afternoon?"

"That's fine, Master," Maria replied, going over to John's bookshelf and taking down the 'A' volume of the Encyclopedia. "I'll read for a while, if that's all right."

Cena nodded, figuring it'd give her a chance to catch up to maybe the year 100. "If you get tired of reading, there's TV or the DVD player." He showed her how to work both and left the pretty redhead mesmerized as she watched the antics of one Peter Griffin and family.


	2. Chapter 2: Education Genie Style

**Disclaimer:** See Chapter One.

**Chapter Two: Education Genie-Style**

After her new master headed off to bed, Maria put her book aside temporarily and settled down in front of the moving-picture box John had referred to as 'TV'. She watched TV for a little while before turning her attention to his bookshelf. The set of books called 'Encyclopedia' was very helpful, and helped her learn quite a bit. Since he hadn't bothered to ask, she didn't tell him that genies such as herself could absorb knowledge very fast.

After finishing the entire encyclopedia in an hour and fifteen minutes, she returned her attention back to the TV and the thing she now knew to be a DVD player. For the rest of the night, she sat up watching movies, and when John awoke at 6AM to get ready for duty and staggered into the kitchen to make coffee, Maria was wide-awake and literally bubbling over with information. No sooner had John pressed the button to turn on the coffeemaker than his houseguest had started reciting the Declaration of Independence, verbatim.

After she'd gotten about halfway through, Cena stopped her.

"How the hell did you learn that so fast? I don't even know it beyond the first couple lines!"

"Genies can absorb knowledge an incredible speeds," was the answer. "After I finished your Encyclopedia, I started watching your movie collection."

John blinked rapidly, trying to process what the pretty redhead had told him about reading the encyclopedia.

"You read the entire encyclopedia in one night?"

Maria shook her head. "No, it was actually more like an hour and a half."

"Holy crap." John sank onto one of the barstools and stared off into space as Maria continued to tell him about the movies she'd watched. She was still talking ninety-to-nothing as he headed back into his bedroom and put on his camo uniform. She didn't stop talking until he came out of the bedroom dressed for work.

Maria stared at her new master and his choice of outfit. She had to admit, it was flattering to him, and she felt a fluttery feeling in the pit of her stomach. She thought about asking John what it could be, but he didn't seem to know much beyond the Marine Corps or the things called 'automobiles' and 'sports' that she'd read about last night in the encyclopedia. She was brought out of her reverie by John's voice.

"I'll be back around four thirty or so. While I'm gone, don't go outside, answer the phone, or open the door for anyone, ok? Other than that, you can do whatever you want."

The redhead nodded and smiled her beautiful smile. "Have a good day at work."

The Marine officer looked at her, unused to having someone say that to him. Not even Liz - when she'd lived with him - had said it. Combined with that smile that turned his insides to mush, it was a wonder he remembered how to even start his car he was so disoriented.

WWEWWEWWEWWEWWEWWEWWEWWEWWEWWEWWEWWE

After John left, Maria watched a few more movies - throwing in some military ones to possibly impress John with - before becoming bored and deciding to try something else. She glanced around the apartment and - based on what she'd seen in the movies she'd watched - the place had the usual clutter of being occupied by a single man.

She smiled to herself. _A quick spell, and the apartment will be clean and ready for inspection._ She giggled at her use of a military term before standing in the center of the living room and waving her right arm in a circle with her pointer finger pointing out.

"Magic forces, come to me...help me get this apartment clean!"

The result stunned her...the spell apparently worked a little too well.

WWEWWEWWEWWEWWEWWEWWEWWEWWEWWEWWEWWE

John parked his car outside his apartment building and slowly got out, thankful it was Friday night and he was off for the weekend. As he approached the doors to the building, he glanced up at the group of windows he knew were his, and smiled, finding it nice to know that there was someone waiting for him again.

_Feels good, doesn't it?_ his mind asked him.

_Yup, sure does._

_Doesn't matter to you one bit that the person waiting for you is a drop-dead gorgeous redhead, does it?_

John stopped a moment and thought before shaking his head. It would do him absolutely no good to even think of Maria as a more-than-friends prospect - especially while she was on that whole 'Master' kick - and he wasn't really one to have one-night stands.

_Gotta force myself not to think about her in that way_.

_Riiight,_ the voice in his head replied sarcastically, _and you try and ignore that smile of hers while you're at it, too._

John told his mind to shut up and was about to go through the doors when he saw his apartment windows light up briefly with a bright flash of light.

_Uh-oh_.

He ran inside the building, unable to shake the feeling something had gone horribly wrong. As such, he didn't even bother with the elevator and instead ran up the three flights of stairs to his apartment. When he got inside, all he could do was look around frantically in disbelief.

The apartment was as bare as the day he'd moved in, save for one beautiful, very confused-looking redhead standing in the middle of the living room.


	3. Chapter 3: A Night At The Opera Part 1

**Chapter Three: A Night at the Opera - Part 1**

John forced himself to stay calm. "Maria...what'd you do? Where's all my stuff?"

The redhead turned in surprise when she heard his voice. "I don't know...I - I -"

"It's ok," John replied, trying to calm the flustered young woman. "You can tell me the truth...I'm not gonna get mad or anything."

At his statement the redhead stuck out her chin in defiance.

"You want the truth? YOU CAN'T HANDLE THE TRUTH!" she yelled before smiling brightly. John rolled his eyes.

"I see you watched _A Few Good Men_," he noted with a wry grin. "Seriously though...what happened?"

Maria dropped her gaze to the floor. "I did a simple spell to try and clean the apartment, but I think I did it wrong."

John looked around and shook his head. "No, it worked, but I think it worked a little too well. The apartment's clean...a little too clean. Is there some kind of reverse spell that'll undo this?"

At his question, Maria brightened. "Yeah, there is!" She concentrated for a moment before waving her right hand. "Magic forces, I demand...reverse the spell that came from my hand!"

There was another bright flash of light, and suddenly the apartment was back exactly the way he'd left it that morning, causing both to exhale in relief.

John was about to say something when a beeping noise began coming from the kitchen. Curious, he walked into the room, only to find the toaster as the source of the noise. Curiosity turned to nervousness as John backed into the doorway and turned to Maria.

"Um, Maria...why is my toaster beeping?"

The redhead gave him a confused look. "Toaster?"

"Yeah, you know...the thing that heats up slices of bread."

The Marine's insides melted as Maria smiled her dazzling smile when comprehension dawned. "Oh, yeah...the springy bread-warmer thingie!"

John grinned at her. "Yeah, that thing. Why's it beeping? It's never done that before."

Maria shrugged. "I dunno. Try doing something to it to make it stop...maybe that'll work."

"Why didn't I think of that?" John muttered sarcastically as he walked back into the kitchen and regarded the noise-making appliance nervously before reaching out and pressing down on the spring activator.

The beeping stopped, and the side of the toaster lit up like a television screen to reveal a pretty blonde that seemed just as surprised to see John.

"Are you the one that performed that spell?" she asked confusedly.

By now, most guys would've run screaming for the hills, especially after coming home to a completely-empty apartment, seeing all their worldly possessions suddenly reappear out of thin air in the blink of an eye, and finally, seeing their toaster act like a television set, but John was a Marine and made of tougher stuff. He merely sighed and called into the living room.

"Oh, Maria...toaster."

The redhead walked into the kitchen, looking at John strangely, but the moment she saw the image of the person on the side of the toaster, she squealed happily and ran over to the counter.

"Stacy! It's been so long!"

The blonde squealed right back. _"Maria! You finally got released! I've missed you so much!"_

The two women started talking excitedly. John looked back and forth from Maria to the toaster a couple times in disbelief before finally shaking his head.

"I'll leave you two to chat." He paused and smiled at Stacy's image. "Nice to meet you, whoever you are."

"Oh, I'm sorry, John...this is my friend Stacy," Maria introduced them. "We knew each other way back when. Stacy, this is my new Master, John."

John smiled and greeted Stacy, but the whole concept of talking to one's toaster was a bit much for him, so he quickly excused himself and headed for the shower. Once he was gone, Stacy let out a whistle.

_"Yeow! You sure got lucky with this one! What's he do for a living?"_

"He's a Marine, whatever that means," Maria replied, and Stacy's eyes widened.

_"_Semper fi_! I wouldn't mind seeing __that__ in dress blues!"_

"Why'd you speak Latin just now?" Maria wondered, causing Stacy to giggle.

_"_Semper fidelis_...it means 'Always Faithful'. That's the motto for the Marines."_

"Oh..."

_"So has he used any of his wishes yet?"_

Maria shook her head. "No...he doesn't seem to be eager to do so, either."

She told Stacy the gist of what had happened since John had released her, along with how she'd managed to make the entire contents of the apartment vanish when she'd tried to clean up, causing the blonde to giggle.

_"You never did manage to pull that spell off correctly...something always went wrong. Did he flip when he saw it?"_

"No, he just asked me to tell him the truth about what happened, and when I did, he said the spell worked, but it worked a little too well, and then asked if there was a way to reverse it, which - obviously - there is."

_"He didn't get mad? He sounds like a treasure...most guys I'd know would flip if something like that happened to them. Hang onto this one for as long as possible."_

Their conversation was interrupted by John strolling into the kitchen, shirtless. He opened the refrigerator, took out a soda, and smiled at them before strolling into the living room, completely oblivious to the fact that both women were all but drooling over him. Shortly thereafter, they heard the opening chorus of _Family Guy_ blaring from the TV.

_"Oh yeah,"_ Stacy recovered, _"__definitely__ hang onto this one!"_

WWEWWEWWEWWEWWEWWEWWEWWEWWEWWEWWE

The girls chatted a few more minutes before ending their conversation, promising to get together soon. Once the blonde had faded from view, Maria went into the living room, where she found John watching FSN.

The Marine glanced up and smiled in greeting. "Did you wanna watch something?" he asked, offering her the remote.

The pretty redhead smiled and changed the channel to Cartoon Network, which was running a Looney Tunes marathon. A cartoon was just starting: _What's Opera, Doc?_, and upon seeing the title, John groaned.

"Opera...that reminds me! My Division CO's visiting tomorrow, and he's got most of the Brigade Staff opera tickets."

"Sounds like fun," Maria replied, never having been to an opera (and wanting to go, after seeing the part in _Pretty Woman_ where Richard Gere's character takes Julia Roberts' character to the opera), and John grimaced.

"Maybe it does to some people, but it's not something I'm looking forward to. Then again, telling a 2-star General you're not going isn't really an option, so I have to go. In addition to this, I have to find a date for it."

"I'll go!" the words were out of Maria's mouth before she could stop herself. To her surprise, John grinned.

"That takes care of the 'finding a date' part. Thanks for volunteering."

"I wasn't volunteering...I actually wanna go."

John reached into the pocket of his sweatpants and pulled out his wallet. "We gotta take you shopping, though," he stated. "You can't exactly wear what you're wearing now." He indicated Maria's outfit.

_No matter how gorgeous you look in it_, he added silently, then cursed his brain for even thinking it.

Maria shook her head. "You don't need to buy me clothes...that's one of the great things about having magic powers."

John smiled and repocketed his wallet with visible relief at not having to make a considerable dent in his savings. He was about to reply when the phone rang. He picked up the handset, glanced at the Caller ID, and grinned when he saw who it was.

"'Sup, man," he greeted after pressing the 'Talk' button.

_"Not much,"_ came the voice of Captain Randy Orton, his best friend and Battalion XO. _"Just calling to see if you need a number from my collection to find yourself a date for this opera thing."_

John laughed. "Actually, no...I've got it covered. I have a date already."

_"Nice,"_ came the reply. _"In that case, got any numbers for me? I've been through my collection already and no takers."_

"Sorry, man...I don't know any - " John cut himself off as an idea popped into his head. "Hang on a sec, aight?" He put Randy on hold and turned to Maria.

"Quick question: Is your friend Stacy single?"

Maria blinked in surprise for a minute before answering slowly. "Yeah, she is...why?"

"Wanna meet up with her at this opera thing? I have a friend who needs a date."

His heart skipped a beat as the redhead favored him with yet another dazzling smile.

"Sure! I'll go call her right now!" She raced off into the kitchen as John resumed his conversation with Randy.

"I got somebody for you, man...my date's got a friend who's single."

A sigh came over the line. _"I dunno, man...I don't really like blind dates."_

"What about all those girls you'd pick up at clubs when we were in OCS?" John demanded. "What d'you call them?"

_"One-night stands,"_ his friend joked.

John saw Maria come back into the room with a smile on her face. "Hang on a sec." He placed his hand over the mouthpiece. "What'd she say?"

"She's gonna meet us here tomorrow night at six-fifteen...I gave her directions to your place."

"Cool." He resumed his conversation with Randy. "Be here around six tomorrow night...your date's meeting us here."

_"See you then,"_ Randy replied before hanging up. John resumed watching TV, but then noticed Maria wanting to say something. "What?"

The redhead sighed. "I have another friend who wants to come...she was with Stacy when I called. I don't suppose you have another friend who needs a date?"

John was about to say no when he remembered his Battalion Sergeant Major, who was looked upon favorably by nearly every woman he came in contact with, but after his recent messy divorce seemed to want nothing to do with women outside of work. He grinned, thinking of the conundrum the man must be going through right then.

"Actually, I just thought of someone. Hang on and I'll call him." He grabbed his cordless again and dialed the number.

_"Dave Batista,"_ his Sergeant Major's voice came over the line.

"How's the date hunt going, Sergeant Major?" John smirked, and he could almost see his friend's eyes roll.

_"It's not. I'm going to this thing, but I'm flying solo. If they don't like it, they can court-martial me."_

"Actually, I got a solution for you. See, I have a date, and she has two friends that she hasn't seen in a long time and wants to meet them there. One of them can go because I set her up...I just need a date for the other one."

When he heard Dave about to protest, he added, "C'mon, man...it's one date, then you can go back to your self-imposed isolation and never see her again. Plus, your showing up with a date'll make the brass happy...what do you say?"

The Sergeant Major sighed wearily. _"Fine,"_ he relented. John placed his hand over the mouthpiece. "Got your other friend a date...call her and tell her I need directions to her place to give to my friend."

Maria smiled at him and ran for the kitchen. "She already said she'd just meet us at the opera house."

"What's her name?" John called after her.

"Trish!" was the reply.

John resumed his conversation with Dave. "Ok, it's set. Even better for you, she said she'll meet you there...you don't even have to go pick her up."

_"Can't wait,"_ was the sarcastic reply. _"What's she look like?"_

"Dunno, man...couldn't tell you. I haven't seen her myself."

_"You don't even know what she looks like?"_ came the incredulous response. _"Great...with my luck, I'll be giving a dream date to Gertha, Bearded Troll-Woman of the Enchanted Forest."_

John burst out laughing. "Aw, come on, man...don't think like that. Be positive!"

_"Yeah, sure,"_ was the reply. _"Do you at least know her name?"_

"Now that I can tell you...it's Trish."

_"And here I was looking forward to meeting Gertha,"_ the Sergeant Major muttered. _"All right, sir, I'll see you tomorrow night."_

"Later, man," John replied, and hung up. He glanced up as Maria came out of the kitchen, smiling happily.

"Is Trish excited?" he asked, and Maria nodded.

"She can't wait! Thanks for doing this, Master...I really appreciate it."

"No problem, and call me John," the Marine replied. "I don't care for all that 'Master' BS."

The conversation dwindled as the two returned their attention to the TV, but both were thinking along the same lines: _How will tomorrow night go?_


	4. Chapter 4: A Night At The Opera Part 2

**Chapter Four: A Night at the Opera - Part 2**

From the time they got up the following morning, John and Maria were busy getting ready for the upcoming evening. Finding a dress was no problem for Maria; she already knew the exact outfit she wanted, but had no idea how she wanted her hair to look. So she spent the day in front of the bathroom mirror, fixing her auburn locks into different styles and then asking John for his opinion.

John, however, was of little or no help; he - naturally - didn't know anything about current women's hairstyles, and was too busy perfecting the placement of ribbons and medals on his formal dress uniform. He wasn't very committed to this task, either; it was the weekend and college football was on TV. Maria giggled when she looked in the bedroom and found John standing by his closet door and screaming at the small 13-inch television on his dresser at - in his opinion, anyway - a bad call made by the referee in the game he was watching.

The opera started at eight, but everyone was requested to be there by seven-thirty at the latest. It was an thirty-minute drive to the opera house, and John wanted to be there by seven, so the two started getting ready around five-thirty. John decided to be a gentleman and let Maria have the bedroom to dress in, while he took his uniform and crowded into the bathroom.

Ever the fast dresser, John was ready before Maria and went out to the living room to wait for her. Finally, he heard the bedroom door open and footsteps coming down the hall, and he stood up right before she entered the room.

When Maria came into the living room, John's jaw nearly hit the floor. She was absolutely beautiful. Her gown was a deep forest green with matching emerald jewelry and pumps, and her outfit was completed by the addition of long white opera gloves. She'd put eyeliner around her eyes, giving her appearance a slightly sultry look, and her auburn hair was done up in an attractive twist.

For her part, Maria barely restrained herself from drooling when she saw John. As expected for a Marine officer, his formal dress uniform was immaculate, complete down to white gloves. About the only thing missing from it was a dress saber. She knew right then and there she'd fallen for John, and fallen hard. The two gazed at each other, neither able to move or speak.

The intimate moment was broken by a knock on the door. John blinked dazedly as though trying to figure out what the noise was before it finally registered with his brain that someone was at the door.

"I'll be right back," he murmured softly, and the redhead merely nodded absently.

Maria heard him open the door and exchange greetings with another male voice. Seconds later, he was back, with Randy in tow.

"Maria, this is Captain Randy Orton, my best friend and second-in-command. Randy, this my date Maria."

The redhead smiled brightly, and Randy put on his best charming smile, actually leaning over to kiss her hand while John watched him with an 'are-you-serious?' look on his face.

"Pleasure to meet you, Maria," Randy stated. "John's a very lucky man."

"And he knows it," John put in, causing Randy to smirk and Maria to smile brightly at him. The three sat in the living room and made small talk for a few minutes before another knock at the door interrupted them. Maria got up and headed for the door as fast as she dared in her new heels.

"The moment of truth arrives," Randy muttered softly - as the two heard Maria open the door and two sets of female voices squeal ecstatically - causing John to roll his eyes.

"Relax, man...she probably looks all right."

They stood as the girls' voices grew louder, signaling their imminent return, and were stunned when the girls entered the room.

'All right' didn't even touch how pretty Stacy was. The young woman had long blonde hair, a supermodel's body, deep, soulful eyes, a mischievous smile, and legs that went on forever could be seen through the slit up the side of her deep rose strapless evening gown.

"Holy crap..." John trailed off, totally blown away.

"I owe you for this, man," Randy muttered. "I owe you big time."

Stacy seemed quite taken with Randy, who was all but drooling over the leggy blonde, to the point of actually tripping over his words, which Stacy seemed to find fairly amusing. The group took John's car to the opera house, and Stacy chattered away in the back seat while Randy hung on every word - or at least pretended to - and Maria and John stole quick glances at each other in the front seat.

Upon arrival at the opera house, they headed inside after John got his car keys back from the valet, and joined the group of Marines in the lobby. Maria and Stacy were introduced to John and Randy's Division Commander, Major General Vince McMahon, the Division XO, Brigadier General Theodore Long, and General McMahon's aide, Lieutenant Colonel Shane McMahon.

The two then met John's direct CO, his Brigade Commander, Colonel Ric Flair, the Brigade XO, Lieutenant Colonel Shawn Michaels and his wife Mickie, as well as the Brigade Sergeant Major, Sergeant Major Roderick Piper.

John also pointed out the other Battalion Commander, Lieutenant Colonel Hunter Helmsley and his wife Stephanie, and Helmsley's senior NCO, Sergeant Major Paul Wight and his wife, in addition to Helmsley's three Company Commanders, Captains Matt and Jeff Hardy and Phil Brooks. Brooks and the Hardy brothers had dates of their own, three beautiful Marine Captains whom John identified as Captains Wilson, Massaro, and Michelle.

John then met up with his own Company Commanders, Captains Rhodes, London, and Kendrick, all of whom had dates, and who - like most of the men - looked as though they desperately wanted to be somewhere else.

Randy suddenly nudged John. "Look who just showed up."

The group turned to look at the entrance, and John's eyebrows raised in surprise at the sight of a Marine Major escorting a beautiful young blonde who didn't look a day over eighteen.

"Who's that?" Maria asked.

"That's Major Chris Jericho, Hunter's Battalion Exec," Randy replied. "And the young woman he's with is First Lieutenant Blank, a Supply Officer from Camp Lejune."

At that moment, they were approached by John's Sergeant Major, who looked extremely uncomfortable at being there.

"Hey, Dave," John greeted.

The Sergeant Major nodded in return, and graciously smiled when introduced to Maria and Stacy. He then looked around briefly before turning to John.

"Has Trish arrived yet?"

"We haven't seen her," Maria replied.

"You sound anxious to meet her, Dave," Randy joked, prompting a mock-glower from the Sergeant Major.

"Hardly...I just don't care much for blind dates." He sighed. "I'm gonna go get some coffee...I'll be back in a few minutes."

WWEWWEWWEWWEWWEWWEWWEWWEWWEWWEWWE

Dave headed over to the refreshment stand and ordered a cup of coffee to soothe his frayed nerves. _You never should've agreed to this...you never should've agreed to this_, his mind kept repeating, and he started cursing the fact he hadn't listened to it in the first place and just gone to this thing solo like he'd originally planned to do, or disobeyed orders for the first time in his career and stayed home, holed up in his apartment.

He was jarred from his thoughts by someone coming to stand next to him. He turned to glance at them, and his coherent faculties seemed to instantly abandon him at the sight of the gorgeous buxom blonde in the strapless silver dress.

She noticed him gazing at her and gave him a flirtatious smile that made his knees weak.

"Hi."

"H-Hi," the Sergeant Major managed to reply, and the blonde laughed throatily at his nervousness, the husky sound turning Dave's insides to mush.

"Buy me a cup of coffee?" the blonde offered, and Dave practically did a happy dance in his mind. Of course, then he remembered he was there to meet someone, which totally killed the happy streak he had going.

"Ordinarily, I'd love to," he replied, "but I'm actually here to meet someone, and I don't want them getting the wrong idea if they see me buying another woman a drink."

The blonde raised an eyebrow. "Wow...a true gentleman. I didn't think there were any left in the world."

Dave smiled at her compliment and watched her pick her purse up off the counter.

"Maybe I'll see you during intermission," the blonde told him as she started to move off before turning back to him. "My name's Trish, by the way."

Dave's mind went into overdrive. _Please don't toy with me like this, God...it's not fair._

"Actually," he said, deciding to take a chance and praying he was right, "I'd like to take you up on your offer and buy you a cup of coffee." When she gave him another mind-blowing smile and came back to the counter, he added, "I'm Dave...it's nice to meet you."

This time it was Trish's mind that went into overdrive. Maria had told her she was setting her up with a Marine Sergeant Major named Dave. The only reason she'd come over here was after seeing the stripes on the guy's sleeve.

_This__ is Dave?! Yeeoow...Semper Fi, baby!_ Her mind screamed. She managed to find her voice. "Maria's friend John's friend?" she asked hopefully, and Dave nodded.

"Yeah, that's me."

Now it was Trish's turn to do a happy dance in her mind.

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After making sure everyone was present and accounted for - and Dave and Trish had joined the group, John and Randy privately drooled over Maria's other friend, and Dave had told John he also owed him big time - General McMahon led the group to their seats, He'd reserved three balconies for his officers, with six couples to a balcony.

Generals McMahon and Long, Colonel McMahon, Colonel Flair, and Sergeant Majors Piper and Wight and their wives occupied one box, the six Company Commanders another, and Colonels Michaels and Helmsley, their wives, John and Maria, Randy and Stacy, Dave and Trish, and Major Jericho and Lieutenant Blank occupied the third.

One look at the programs made quite a few of the guys swear under their breath when they saw it was a double feature: _The Barber of Seville_ and _The Marriage of Figaro_. The girls - save for Lieutenant Blank, who appeared to have eyes only for her date - all seemed quite pleased with this, and eagerly awaited for the curtain to go up.

By the end of the evening, in John and Maria's box, Randy had long since fallen asleep, John and Dave were struggling to stay awake, and Mrs. Helmsley and Mrs. Michaels had long since given up trying to get their husbands to pay attention and had completely focused their attentions on the stage along with Maria, Stacy, and Trish. Colonels Helmsley and Michaels, meanwhile, had turned their chairs to face each other, and were involved in a fierce tournament of 'Go Fish'.

As for Major Jericho and his date, nobody had seen them since Lieutenant Blank had slipped out to find the ladies' room about thirty minutes after the curtain had gone up, and not two minutes had gone by before the Major followed.

When the curtain finally fell to thunderous applause, Randy jerked awake, nearly falling out of his chair as he did so, causing Stacy to giggle at him. John and Dave both awoke from light dozes and stood and applauded along with their dates, while Shawn and Hunter were still absorbed in their game.

John, Randy, and Dave muttered thanks about the evening finally being over while the ladies said goodbye to each other before Stephanie and Mickie turned to their husbands, who'd just begun another hand of cards.

"Come on, Colonel," Stephanie addressed her husband, "say goodnight to Shawn...you can play with him again on Monday."

Hunter Helmsley finally looked up from his hand. "But we just started another hand...can't we finish it?"

Stephanie looked at her husband as if to say, _'You're kidding me, right?'_

Mickie James-Michaels simply headed for the exit, calling over her shoulder, "Shawn, the opera's over, I'm ready to go home, the kids are at my parents', and I made a trip to Vickie Secrets earlier today..."

"Right," her husband replied, turning to his friend. "Gotta go, buddy...see ya Monday."

"Lucky," Hunter muttered under his breath at his friend's retreating back as he gathered the cards and followed his own wife.

"Nah, not lucky...just smart," John stated, and Dave and Randy both agreed with him.

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The group broke up on the steps of the opera house. Dave and Trish had decided to go to an all-night diner and talk, while Randy and Stacy rode back with John and Maria to get their cars.

As John drove them back to his apartment building, Randy glanced over at the beautiful blonde sitting beside him. He wanted to get to know her better, and for the first time, he didn't mean his usual way of 'love 'em and leave 'em'.

He was saved from trying to start a conversation by Stacy quietly speaking to him.

"I had a great time tonight, Randy..." she smirked at him. "It's too bad you're tired; I would've loved to have a late dinner and get to know you better."

_Score!_ The Captain's mind yelled. Randy managed to get over his surprise and find his voice.

"I'm not tired...I'd like to have dinner also."

Stacy grinned at his reply. "I guess that little nap you took perked you right up, huh?"

Randy nodded like a puppy eager for attention.

Stacy giggled. "In that case, why don't you follow me to my favorite restaurant once we get our cars? It's not far from here."

"Sure", Randy replied, even as his mind began doing its own happy dance.

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Upon arriving back at John's apartment building, Randy and Stacy said their goodbyes and sped off in their cars, leaving John and Maria alone. John watched the cars disappear before turning to see his lovely date sitting on the steps of his building, gazing up at the stars.

Seeing she didn't want to go inside yet, John sat down beside her. Silence reigned for a few minutes before Maria sighed disappointedly.

"I had a much-better view of the stars from Sheik Hassan's palace in the desert...when he let me out of my lamp, that is," she amended. "Of course, they didn't have a lot of tall buildings with those magic lights, either."

John turned to look at her. "'Magic lights'?" he asked confusedly.

Maria nodded. "Yeah, your apartment has them too. You walk into a room, flip a switch on the wall, and suddenly there's light!" The cute puzzled expression came over her face again. "The encyclopedia called it something, but I can't remember what it was."

John smiled at her description. "That's called 'electricity'."

He was favored with another dazzling smile. "Yeah, that's it!"

Maria was about to say something else, but ended up yawning instead. John smiled at her and got to his feet, extending his hand to help her up.

"Come on, let's get upstairs and get some sleep."

The beautiful redhead nodded sleepily and leaned on John - not that he minded one bit - as they walked inside and waited for the elevator. When they got inside the apartment, John let Maria use the bedroom to get changed, while he used the bathroom himself. He emerged dressed for bed, and carried his dress uniform on hangars into the bedroom to hang up, only to find his gorgeous roommate fast asleep on his bed.

_Man, she looks like an angel_, he thought briefly, before shaking his head and going to hang his uniform up. He thought about carrying Maria out to the sofa at first, but then scratched the idea, knowing she'd be much more comfortable where she currently was.

Gently, he lifted her so as to pull the covers down and put her under them, and was about to go and claim the sofa for himself when the redhead rolled over in her sleep, latching onto his arm and not letting go.

John sighed and slipped under the covers himself ignoring the little devil on his shoulder that was doing a happy dance at this unexpected turn of events. No sooner had he pulled the blankets up and gotten situated than Maria curled up next to him and laid her head on his shoulder, sighing contentedly in her sleep. Not wanting to wake her up by moving her over - not to mention the fact he really liked where Maria was - John reached over and turned off the lamp on the nightstand before closing his eyes and falling asleep himself.

**Author's Note:** Sorry I haven't updated in so long; the library was being incredibly anal about allowing me to use disks I brought from home. But I snuck some disks in and posted chapters just for you guys...ain't I sweet for doing that? For those of you who are fans of my story _Dress Whites & Divas_, don't worry; I haven't forgotten about it...I'm working on the next chapter. And watch for another WWE-themed story next month!

**Also:** For those who want to have a better picture of Maria's dress she wore to the opera, think of the red dress Julia Roberts wore in the movie _Pretty Woman_ and change the color to a deep green.

**R&R!**


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